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- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe -
-- for www.addic7ed.com --
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Thank you, Linda. Another perfect pour.
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Ugh. The phone people keep
charging us for a hot spot,
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whatever that is. I'm gonna call them.
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Definitely. Later. Not-not today.
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- May-Maybe next month.
- There you go.
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20% off an oil change.
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We're probably supposed
to be getting those.
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When was the last time you got one?
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Last year? Or, um,
maybe the year before?
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I mean, definitely
since Louise was born.
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You really got to stay on those, Bob.
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Yeah, I know, Teddy.
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Really helps with the
lifespan of the car.
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Okay, thanks. Yes, I got it.
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I do 'em myself. Just
takes, like, an hour or two.
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Three, three and a
half if you're buzzed.
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- You should do it yourself.
- I'm just not good
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at that "being responsible" stuff.
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You're good at some of that stuff.
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Didn't you reset our
clock the other day?
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- After the power went out?
- That was you.
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Oh, right. You just wanted
to not use that clock anymore.
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Well, concrete's probably
dry at Mr. Fischoeder's.
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I'm putting a basketball
hoop in his bathroom
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and a toilet on his basketball court.
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That guy's life, huh?
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- See you later.
- Okay, bye.
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- Hey, guys.
- Hello.
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- Hey, Teddy.
- Theodore.
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- Hey, kids. How was school?
- Don't worry about it.
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It was about four hours
too long and a little talky.
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Hey, remember how I wanted to volunteer
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at the animal hospital
and read to animals?
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I don't think that's what volunteers do.
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Animals don't have thumbs, Louise.
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They, uh, can't turn the pages.
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Anyway, so, you know how I need
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my birth certificate
for the application?
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Well, it's due tomorrow. Do
you guys know where that is?
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I do. Uh, I know where
your birth certificate is,
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because I very responsibly
put it in a very safe place.
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- Okay.
- In a safe.
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- A little fire safe.
- Cool.
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There's lots of other
important documents in there
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that I'm responsibly keeping safe.
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Does toilet paper count
as important papers?
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If so, we're rich.
49
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Oh, God. I forgot to buy toilet paper.
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At least there's one thing
I put in the right place.
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Oh, come on. Where's the key?
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Where's the key? The freakin' key!
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♪ Bus too slow, I
wanna take a boat ♪
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♪ Boat too wet, I wanna take a jet ♪
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♪ Jet killed a bird,
I wanna take a herd ♪
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♪ Of sheep to the meadow ♪
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♪ Say hello to the fellow
making yellow on a cello ♪
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♪ Cello's too wet,
so we get a clarinet ♪
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♪ Clarinet's too reedy,
so we went to Ally Sheedy ♪
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♪ Ally Sheedy's too busy,
so we got her sister Lizzie ♪
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♪ Lizzie Sheedy likes to cuss ♪
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♪ When she's driving on the bus ♪
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♪ These are the words
she likes to say ♪
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♪ Crotch, dingle, crap, boob ♪
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♪ Fart, nips, tips, double dips ♪
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♪ And that's why we
drove off the cliff. ♪
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Man, how are you guys even doing that?
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Oh, I love it!
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But that's not how we used to do it.
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Gene, do it with me. I'll show you how.
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♪ Welcome to the offices of
chicken legs and sausages ♪
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♪ We're going to the zoo today ♪
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♪ We're gonna eat some ostriches ♪
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♪ Oh, they left? Well,
that's for the best ♪
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♪ But while we're here,
let's go get a beer ♪
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♪ Oh, they don't have booze?
Then how about a cruise? ♪
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♪ These are the things
they have on the boat ♪
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♪ Checkers, cribbage,
lettuce, spinach ♪
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♪ Slots, cots, garlic knots ♪
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♪ And now we sink into the sea. ♪
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I don't understand how you can do
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the clapping and the
talking at the same time.
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- We can teach you, Tina.
- You can?
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Sure! My cousin Valerie could do it,
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and she only had one
arm. She still does.
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00:03:13,907 --> 00:03:15,653
- Bob's Burgers.
- Lin, it's me.
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00:03:15,678 --> 00:03:17,206
- I-I need your help.
- Where are you?
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Under the bed.
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00:03:18,306 --> 00:03:19,818
Do you know where the
key to the safe is?
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No, I have no idea. How's
it look under the bed?
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- Gross.
- I bet.
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Will you ask the kids
if they've seen it?
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00:03:24,981 --> 00:03:26,715
Kids, have you seen the key to the safe?
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00:03:26,740 --> 00:03:28,999
No. Did you ask Dad?
He seemed to be on top of it.
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- I'm on the phone with him.
- Tell him I say hi.
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00:03:30,670 --> 00:03:32,452
- Tina says hi.
- Hi, Tina.
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- Dad says hi back.
- Aw.
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Ask Dad if he thinks I'm ready
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00:03:35,364 --> 00:03:37,364
to start sharing underwear with him.
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00:03:37,389 --> 00:03:39,277
- Oof!
- Dad, you got this.
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Bob, I think Louise is coming upstairs
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00:03:40,986 --> 00:03:42,472
to jump on the bed and squish you.
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00:03:42,497 --> 00:03:44,756
Yeah, she did it. It's
really fun. And helpful.
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- Uh, I'm gonna hang up, Lin.
- Okay.
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Let's hang up at the same
time. Oh, you hung up.
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So, just looking everywhere, huh?
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Uh-huh. I know I bought the safe,
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and the key came with the safe.
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And I put the important
stuff in the safe.
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Closed the safe. Took
the key. And then I...
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- Threw it?
- No.
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Oh! And then I wanted to put the key
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00:04:01,534 --> 00:04:03,316
on my keychain to be responsible,
114
00:04:03,341 --> 00:04:05,558
but I realized I left
my keys in the car.
115
00:04:05,583 --> 00:04:07,383
That way your car's just ready to go.
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00:04:07,408 --> 00:04:09,884
So, I went out to the
car to look for my keys,
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00:04:09,909 --> 00:04:11,760
and then, uh, Hugo walked by.
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So I ducked down so I
wouldn't have to talk to him.
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- So brave.
- But then he saw me,
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so I, uh, I pretended
to be on a phone call.
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Hands-free, even though
our car doesn't have that.
122
00:04:21,036 --> 00:04:22,553
So, should we maybe look in the car?
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No, I get carsick.
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- But it wouldn't be mov...
- Bye-bye.
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00:04:27,131 --> 00:04:28,518
It's got to be in here.
126
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Oh, God.
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00:04:30,888 --> 00:04:33,023
Right. That doesn't open anymore.
128
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It's so hard to bend.
129
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What a mess. I'm a monster.
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Oh, there you are,
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screwdriver that I've
re-bought a bunch of times
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'cause I didn't know where you were.
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00:04:42,507 --> 00:04:43,861
Jury duty summons. Perfect.
134
00:04:43,886 --> 00:04:46,330
I wish I knew you were there
since I'm a fugitive now,
135
00:04:46,355 --> 00:04:48,069
I guess. Yep, there are the ants.
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00:04:48,080 --> 00:04:50,489
You guys are still here.
H-How can I live like this?
137
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Ow! My back! Seizing up!
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00:04:52,838 --> 00:04:55,494
Aah! Ow!
139
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- Hi. How are you?
- I'm fine. You okay?
140
00:04:58,499 --> 00:05:00,749
Yeah, yeah. Couldn't be happier.
141
00:05:00,760 --> 00:05:02,667
All right.
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00:05:02,692 --> 00:05:04,713
Okay, if I... If I lay like this...
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00:05:06,559 --> 00:05:07,891
This feels better.
144
00:05:07,916 --> 00:05:09,841
This is gonna fix itself, and then I...
145
00:05:09,866 --> 00:05:11,603
and then I'll look
for the keys some more.
146
00:05:11,628 --> 00:05:13,437
Oh, lying down reminds
me that I'm tired.
147
00:05:13,514 --> 00:05:15,013
I'm always tired.
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00:05:15,038 --> 00:05:16,417
Just gonna close my eyes for a minute.
149
00:05:16,442 --> 00:05:17,586
But I'm not gonna fall asleep.
150
00:05:18,996 --> 00:05:21,446
Oh, God. I fell asleep. What time is it?
151
00:05:21,471 --> 00:05:24,266
Where am I? Am I dreaming?
152
00:05:24,414 --> 00:05:26,784
Am I tiny? I think I might be tiny.
153
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Pens. Maps.
154
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Am I in my glove compartment?
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Wow, that insurance is very expired.
156
00:05:39,039 --> 00:05:42,624
Okay, either I'm actually tiny
and I'm in my glove compartment
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00:05:42,676 --> 00:05:44,417
and I should maybe be a superhero,
158
00:05:44,442 --> 00:05:48,244
or I'm dreaming, because I'm
a sleepy, middle-aged man,
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00:05:48,269 --> 00:05:49,191
and I fall asleep a lot.
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00:05:49,216 --> 00:05:50,882
If you're dreaming,
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- then am I dreaming?
- Who said that?
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00:05:52,771 --> 00:05:54,938
Me! Rubber Band Squeezy Ball.
163
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What's it been? Like, seven years?
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00:05:56,941 --> 00:05:59,150
Pr-Probably, yeah. I'm sorry
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00:05:59,175 --> 00:06:01,318
about the glove compartment
not opening, Squeezy Ball.
166
00:06:01,343 --> 00:06:03,373
Yeah, it's like a tomb in here.
167
00:06:03,398 --> 00:06:05,991
Man, we used to have
some good times, huh?
168
00:06:06,016 --> 00:06:07,983
You would find a rubber
band every once in a while
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00:06:07,993 --> 00:06:09,901
and then add it on to me.
170
00:06:09,926 --> 00:06:11,496
Yeah.
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00:06:11,521 --> 00:06:13,442
And you'd squeeze me
while you were driving.
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00:06:13,467 --> 00:06:15,476
That was, um, that was our thing.
173
00:06:15,501 --> 00:06:17,409
And you'd come up with ideas, right?
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00:06:17,434 --> 00:06:18,837
Ideas for burgers and stuff.
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00:06:18,862 --> 00:06:20,662
I-I-I... I guess I would.
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00:06:20,687 --> 00:06:24,391
Ah, man, your restaurant
must be so successful by now.
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00:06:24,416 --> 00:06:26,668
What? Oh. No. I mean, we're open.
178
00:06:26,679 --> 00:06:29,437
Hey, um, have you seen a little key?
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00:06:29,462 --> 00:06:31,014
It's really small. It's, like, uh...
180
00:06:31,039 --> 00:06:34,455
Oh. I mean, it was small.
It-It's about this big?
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00:06:34,480 --> 00:06:36,521
- It's for our safe.
- You got a safe?
182
00:06:36,546 --> 00:06:39,350
Look at you! For all
your restaurant money?
183
00:06:39,375 --> 00:06:42,463
No, it's for, um, uh, important papers.
184
00:06:42,488 --> 00:06:45,530
Wow. I know someone that
has important papers!
185
00:06:45,555 --> 00:06:47,480
I've missed you, Squeezy.
186
00:06:47,557 --> 00:06:49,877
I don't know about your key,
187
00:06:49,902 --> 00:06:52,370
but you know who might
be able to help? Tape!
188
00:06:52,395 --> 00:06:55,363
- Tape?
- Yeah. Your old self-help tape,
189
00:06:55,374 --> 00:06:59,169
Strategies for Living: How
to Become a Strategenius.
190
00:06:59,194 --> 00:07:01,056
Oh, right. I started listening to that
191
00:07:01,081 --> 00:07:02,932
for a little bit a long time ago.
192
00:07:02,957 --> 00:07:04,674
Not as much as I should have.
193
00:07:04,699 --> 00:07:07,044
But I think I saw it
under the front seat
194
00:07:07,069 --> 00:07:09,127
before I fell asleep.
How do we get out of here?
195
00:07:09,152 --> 00:07:11,692
What if we squeeze out?
196
00:07:11,717 --> 00:07:12,941
Get it? Squeeze?
197
00:07:12,966 --> 00:07:14,966
Yeah. Yeah, I-I get it.
198
00:07:14,991 --> 00:07:17,329
Am I still your best friend, Bob?
199
00:07:17,354 --> 00:07:19,330
I guess, yes.
200
00:07:20,192 --> 00:07:22,731
All done with Fischoeder's
basketball court toilet.
201
00:07:22,756 --> 00:07:24,232
Wait, did I hook it
up to the sewer line?
202
00:07:24,257 --> 00:07:26,236
- Eh, let's say I did.
- Hoops and poops.
203
00:07:26,261 --> 00:07:29,240
Okay, again. ♪ Bus too
slow, I wanna take a boat. ♪
204
00:07:29,265 --> 00:07:31,232
No, you're-you're supposed
to hit your butt on that.
205
00:07:31,257 --> 00:07:33,401
- I am?
- Yeah. Not the elbow, the butt.
206
00:07:33,412 --> 00:07:35,320
Hey, I know that game. But I learned it
207
00:07:35,345 --> 00:07:37,224
a different way. D-Do it with me.
208
00:07:37,249 --> 00:07:38,968
♪ There's Father Gregory
up in the rectory ♪
209
00:07:38,992 --> 00:07:41,493
♪ There's Sister Eleanor
going to the liquor store ♪
210
00:07:41,518 --> 00:07:43,830
♪ There's all the altar boys
playing dice and making noise ♪
211
00:07:43,855 --> 00:07:45,641
♪ How many combinations
did they roll? ♪
212
00:07:45,666 --> 00:07:47,415
♪ A one and a one ♪
213
00:07:47,426 --> 00:07:49,668
♪ And a one and a two
and a one and a three ♪
214
00:07:49,693 --> 00:07:51,888
♪ And a one and a four
and a one and a five ♪
215
00:07:51,913 --> 00:07:53,683
- ♪ And a one. ♪
- Teddy, Teddy, we get it. We get it.
216
00:07:53,707 --> 00:07:55,059
Yeah, you don't know
where this is going.
217
00:07:55,083 --> 00:07:57,550
♪ A one and a six,
a two and a one... ♪
218
00:07:57,627 --> 00:07:59,094
So everyone can do this except me?
219
00:07:59,104 --> 00:08:01,972
- Is that what's going on?
- Aw, who wants a hug?
220
00:08:01,997 --> 00:08:03,584
That's not a pity hug?
221
00:08:05,611 --> 00:08:07,102
Ha! We're out.
222
00:08:07,112 --> 00:08:08,445
Whoa.
223
00:08:08,707 --> 00:08:10,915
Uh, this feels dangerous.
224
00:08:10,940 --> 00:08:13,225
It does, doesn't it?
So, you're dreaming,
225
00:08:13,250 --> 00:08:14,924
but if you find the key in your dream,
226
00:08:14,949 --> 00:08:16,374
you'll find it in real life?
227
00:08:16,399 --> 00:08:18,083
I-I don't know. Maybe.
228
00:08:18,108 --> 00:08:21,212
And if you die in here,
you'll die in real life?
229
00:08:21,237 --> 00:08:23,705
I mean, I hope not. What's all this?
230
00:08:23,730 --> 00:08:26,711
- Vent ducts. Electrical chassis.
- That's great detail.
231
00:08:26,736 --> 00:08:28,418
It's probably not correct
since I'm dreaming this
232
00:08:28,428 --> 00:08:29,868
and I don't know anything about cars.
233
00:08:29,912 --> 00:08:31,429
No crap you don't!
234
00:08:31,506 --> 00:08:32,933
- Who's that?
- That's the engine.
235
00:08:32,957 --> 00:08:34,257
He sounds mad.
236
00:08:34,268 --> 00:08:35,600
Hey, true or false?
237
00:08:35,625 --> 00:08:37,208
Cars need their oil changed.
238
00:08:37,233 --> 00:08:38,723
- True.
- Don't tell him!
239
00:08:38,748 --> 00:08:40,398
No, I know. Uh, I'm so sorry,
240
00:08:40,423 --> 00:08:43,016
engine. Uh, I-I should be
a lot better about that.
241
00:08:43,041 --> 00:08:44,883
Every 3,000 miles, dipstick!
242
00:08:44,908 --> 00:08:46,904
Hey, don't drag me into this.
243
00:08:46,929 --> 00:08:49,230
You got to change
your brake pads, too, man.
244
00:08:49,255 --> 00:08:51,055
Are you not hearing me squeak?
245
00:08:51,080 --> 00:08:52,427
I-I know, everyone.
246
00:08:52,452 --> 00:08:54,402
I-I'm not good at maintaining things
247
00:08:54,427 --> 00:08:56,904
or, or knowing how to do
the things I should know how to do.
248
00:08:56,929 --> 00:08:58,516
Uh, but I'm trying.
249
00:08:58,541 --> 00:09:01,177
I-I put the kids' birth
certificates in a safe.
250
00:09:01,202 --> 00:09:02,251
Ooh-la-la.
251
00:09:02,276 --> 00:09:03,848
Ooh, big man with the safe, huh?
252
00:09:03,872 --> 00:09:06,080
Okay, we got to go. We-we have a thing.
253
00:09:06,143 --> 00:09:07,776
Bye. Come on.
254
00:09:08,658 --> 00:09:10,460
Disgusting!
255
00:09:10,485 --> 00:09:12,060
Okay, we'll take this nice and slow.
256
00:09:12,085 --> 00:09:13,356
You can do this, Tina.
257
00:09:13,381 --> 00:09:14,964
Tell your hands if they get this right,
258
00:09:14,975 --> 00:09:16,883
you're taking 'em out for ice cream.
259
00:09:16,908 --> 00:09:18,787
- It's weird that she can't do it, right?
- Yeah, I know.
260
00:09:18,812 --> 00:09:20,749
- What'd you say?
- Everyone knows. Uh, nothing.
261
00:09:20,774 --> 00:09:23,274
Focus on me. All right, just
the hand movements, okay?
262
00:09:23,299 --> 00:09:25,141
Here we go. Front of
hands, back of hands...
263
00:09:25,152 --> 00:09:26,768
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Whoa. Too fast.
264
00:09:26,793 --> 00:09:28,705
Front of hands...
265
00:09:28,730 --> 00:09:30,813
Are you driving to the
hospital, Louise? Stop speeding.
266
00:09:31,198 --> 00:09:34,901
Front of hands...
267
00:09:34,926 --> 00:09:36,880
- Slower.
- Back...
268
00:09:36,905 --> 00:09:39,322
of... hands.
269
00:09:39,333 --> 00:09:40,573
Easy.
270
00:09:40,598 --> 00:09:42,960
Now you clap...
271
00:09:42,985 --> 00:09:44,160
Half that speed.
272
00:09:44,171 --> 00:09:46,746
And cross...
273
00:09:46,771 --> 00:09:48,696
- Slower.
- ... your...
274
00:09:48,825 --> 00:09:49,865
Dear Lord.
275
00:09:49,867 --> 00:09:52,460
Cross your... Tina, cross your...
276
00:09:52,485 --> 00:09:54,180
This is ruining my memory of childhood.
277
00:09:54,205 --> 00:09:56,449
You're making Mommy sad, Tina.
278
00:09:58,852 --> 00:10:00,259
- Ow!
- Whee!
279
00:10:00,284 --> 00:10:03,095
- Oh, my back.
- Your back hurts in your dream?
280
00:10:03,120 --> 00:10:04,689
I mean, once you have back problems,
281
00:10:04,714 --> 00:10:06,242
you kinda always have back problems.
282
00:10:06,267 --> 00:10:08,362
I love the fact that
you're a millionaire
283
00:10:08,386 --> 00:10:09,977
but your car looks like crap.
284
00:10:10,002 --> 00:10:12,007
You know, you can tell
a lot about a person
285
00:10:12,032 --> 00:10:13,877
by how they keep their car.
286
00:10:13,902 --> 00:10:15,697
Hi, I'm Tape.
287
00:10:15,722 --> 00:10:18,923
Strategies for Living: How
to Become a Strategenius.
288
00:10:18,948 --> 00:10:20,832
Oh, hey. We were looking for you.
289
00:10:20,857 --> 00:10:22,657
- I'm a big fan.
- I'm-I'm Bob.
290
00:10:22,682 --> 00:10:24,019
Uh, I don't know if you remember me.
291
00:10:24,044 --> 00:10:26,661
I-I didn't listen to much of you.
292
00:10:26,686 --> 00:10:28,357
Why would I remember
the guy who bought me,
293
00:10:28,382 --> 00:10:30,548
listened to three minutes
of me, and then left me
294
00:10:30,573 --> 00:10:32,281
on the dirtiest floor in the world?
295
00:10:32,306 --> 00:10:34,210
I haven't been thinking
about you at all.
296
00:10:34,221 --> 00:10:36,504
- Oh, I'm sor...
- And that's an example
297
00:10:36,529 --> 00:10:39,345
of passive-aggressive
behavior, which is not helpful.
298
00:10:39,370 --> 00:10:42,298
We cover that in chapter nine,
which I guess you'll never hear.
299
00:10:42,323 --> 00:10:44,062
That's not passive-aggressive,
what I just said.
300
00:10:44,087 --> 00:10:45,678
I really think you'll never hear it.
301
00:10:45,703 --> 00:10:46,627
Bob's a millionaire.
302
00:10:46,652 --> 00:10:48,026
Uh, I-I... No, I'm...
303
00:10:48,050 --> 00:10:50,405
I'm not. Uh, hey, I-I need your help.
304
00:10:50,430 --> 00:10:51,827
Yes. Yes, you do.
305
00:10:51,852 --> 00:10:54,751
Right. In general but
also with finding a key.
306
00:10:54,776 --> 00:10:55,792
A silver key.
307
00:10:55,817 --> 00:10:57,066
Bob, I don't know where the key is.
308
00:10:57,128 --> 00:10:58,911
But to be effective in this situation,
309
00:10:58,936 --> 00:11:01,016
you'll need to energize, synthesize,
310
00:11:01,041 --> 00:11:02,415
then synergize.
311
00:11:02,440 --> 00:11:04,426
Um, I know what one of those is.
312
00:11:04,451 --> 00:11:05,751
But what-what do I do?
313
00:11:05,776 --> 00:11:07,660
Divide the car into quadrants,
314
00:11:07,685 --> 00:11:09,088
so you have attainable goals.
315
00:11:09,113 --> 00:11:10,715
I'm still not following.
316
00:11:10,740 --> 00:11:11,884
You got to look under the seat.
317
00:11:11,908 --> 00:11:13,260
That's what I was doing
when I hurt my back.
318
00:11:13,284 --> 00:11:14,926
- Of course you did.
- Yeah, I'm, uh...
319
00:11:15,003 --> 00:11:16,085
I'm-I'm not in good shape.
320
00:11:16,110 --> 00:11:18,351
Wow, really? That's crazy.
321
00:11:18,376 --> 00:11:20,817
You were in such good
shape when you bought me.
322
00:11:20,842 --> 00:11:22,912
Oh, by the way, there's a
bunch of ants coming towards us.
323
00:11:22,936 --> 00:11:24,489
Oh, God. Ants!
324
00:11:25,421 --> 00:11:27,054
I'm small, so they're... huge.
325
00:11:27,079 --> 00:11:29,108
And organized. And strong.
326
00:11:29,133 --> 00:11:31,767
- Plus, these guys are hungry.
- How can you tell?
327
00:11:31,778 --> 00:11:34,008
Don't you think they have
"let's eat those guys" face?
328
00:11:34,033 --> 00:11:36,275
They do. They totally do.
329
00:11:39,602 --> 00:11:41,611
So, Bob, priority level one to five,
330
00:11:41,621 --> 00:11:43,613
- where does staying alive rate?
- Oh, uh, five.
331
00:11:43,623 --> 00:11:45,957
- One is the most.
- Oh, sorry. Then one.
332
00:11:45,982 --> 00:11:48,910
Uh, uh, staying alive is very
important to me right now.
333
00:11:48,935 --> 00:11:51,106
All right, I was worried when
you said five, to be honest.
334
00:11:51,131 --> 00:11:53,039
- Me, too.
- Well, I got confused by your system,
335
00:11:53,064 --> 00:11:55,958
because it's the oppo... I... Whatever.
Wh-What should we do here?
336
00:11:56,032 --> 00:11:58,185
Now that I know our
goal is to stay alive,
337
00:11:58,210 --> 00:12:00,909
let's assess our options
and make an action plan.
338
00:12:00,934 --> 00:12:03,434
I love that. Action plan
sounds great right now.
339
00:12:03,459 --> 00:12:04,967
Want to squeeze me for ideas, Bob?
340
00:12:04,978 --> 00:12:07,919
Uh, Squeezy, I feel like Tape's
got a good handle on things.
341
00:12:07,944 --> 00:12:10,274
- Right, Tape?
- Life doesn't give you handles, Bob.
342
00:12:10,299 --> 00:12:12,141
You have to install them yourself.
343
00:12:12,152 --> 00:12:13,829
See that pencil? Grab it.
344
00:12:13,854 --> 00:12:14,987
Okay. Um...
345
00:12:15,012 --> 00:12:16,896
I-I got it.
346
00:12:16,921 --> 00:12:18,374
Bob, stick it through my right eye
347
00:12:18,399 --> 00:12:20,316
and then hold on for dear life.
348
00:12:20,327 --> 00:12:21,877
Your eye? Won't that hurt?
349
00:12:21,902 --> 00:12:22,954
No, it'll feel good.
350
00:12:22,979 --> 00:12:24,570
Just do it! Now!
351
00:12:24,647 --> 00:12:25,722
- Uh...
- Does "now"
352
00:12:25,724 --> 00:12:27,949
not mean the same thing to you or... ?
353
00:12:27,974 --> 00:12:29,001
Okay, okay!
354
00:12:29,026 --> 00:12:30,835
Sorry.
355
00:12:30,860 --> 00:12:33,839
Being organized means never
having to say you're sorry.
356
00:12:34,090 --> 00:12:35,107
Hyah!
357
00:12:36,616 --> 00:12:37,667
Whoa... !
358
00:12:37,677 --> 00:12:40,845
Hang on! If you have
enough upper body strength!
359
00:12:40,870 --> 00:12:43,140
Which it doesn't look like you do!
360
00:12:43,983 --> 00:12:45,232
Hyah!
361
00:12:46,226 --> 00:12:48,240
Bob, you need to lick this cough drop.
362
00:12:48,265 --> 00:12:50,544
- What?
- You're the only one here with saliva.
363
00:12:50,569 --> 00:12:53,933
You need to lick the old cough
drop to reactivate the flavors.
364
00:12:53,958 --> 00:12:55,245
- Seriously?
- Yes!
365
00:12:55,270 --> 00:12:57,205
Lick now! All over!
366
00:12:57,230 --> 00:12:59,156
The tape is very wise, Bob!
367
00:12:59,181 --> 00:13:01,247
Lick the cough drop!
368
00:13:01,272 --> 00:13:03,202
Oh, God, the ants are climbing up.
369
00:13:04,946 --> 00:13:06,028
It's so dusty.
370
00:13:06,039 --> 00:13:07,280
Get it all... All over!
371
00:13:07,305 --> 00:13:08,864
Get the whole thing moist!
372
00:13:10,261 --> 00:13:12,044
Thath's all I have! Thorry!
373
00:13:12,069 --> 00:13:13,489
Ugh. Fine.
374
00:13:13,514 --> 00:13:15,264
Suck on this, ants.
375
00:13:17,874 --> 00:13:20,167
Ha! It's working!
The ants are going away!
376
00:13:20,192 --> 00:13:21,254
Whoo-hoo!
377
00:13:21,279 --> 00:13:23,982
Hey, uh, did anyone get that on...
378
00:13:24,007 --> 00:13:25,441
tape?
379
00:13:25,466 --> 00:13:27,058
♪ Bus too slow ♪ Again.
380
00:13:27,083 --> 00:13:28,791
♪ Bus too slow. ♪
381
00:13:28,971 --> 00:13:29,779
Again.
382
00:13:29,804 --> 00:13:30,999
Hello, burger people.
383
00:13:31,024 --> 00:13:33,232
It's half past rent o'clock... Oh.
384
00:13:33,257 --> 00:13:34,285
Are you doing the handsy damsel?
385
00:13:34,309 --> 00:13:36,119
Mr. Fischoeder, you know it, too?
386
00:13:36,144 --> 00:13:37,653
Sure! It's been about 60 years.
387
00:13:37,678 --> 00:13:39,758
- Let me see if I remember.
- It's not gonna be easy.
388
00:13:39,783 --> 00:13:41,277
♪ Theodore Roosevelt
made himself a turkey melt ♪
389
00:13:41,301 --> 00:13:43,241
- Seriously?
- ♪ Shared it with a bear ♪
390
00:13:43,266 --> 00:13:44,944
♪ And then he told him
how he really felt ♪
391
00:13:44,969 --> 00:13:48,066
♪ Made himself a daiquiri,
drank it in a factory ♪
392
00:13:48,091 --> 00:13:50,944
♪ How many people
died in the fire? ♪
393
00:13:50,969 --> 00:13:52,877
♪ One, ten, 30. ♪
394
00:13:52,902 --> 00:13:54,869
That's the best .version.
That's coming to school.
395
00:13:54,944 --> 00:13:56,742
Everyone's gonna be doing this tomorrow.
396
00:13:56,767 --> 00:13:58,064
Not everyone.
397
00:13:58,509 --> 00:14:00,082
Whew! That was a close one.
398
00:14:00,093 --> 00:14:02,585
- Yeah. Nice job, Tape.
- Very nice job.
399
00:14:02,596 --> 00:14:05,359
Oh, hey, cool jury duty
summons you never responded to.
400
00:14:05,384 --> 00:14:08,140
Yep. That's not just "not
sticking to my plans."
401
00:14:08,165 --> 00:14:09,727
That's losing the mail.
402
00:14:09,752 --> 00:14:11,104
And-and what are all
these little notes, Bob?
403
00:14:11,128 --> 00:14:13,601
They look like a bunch
of lost to-do lists.
404
00:14:13,626 --> 00:14:16,098
Is the first item on
every list "lose list"?
405
00:14:16,109 --> 00:14:17,609
Yes, I know, I know.
406
00:14:17,634 --> 00:14:19,837
There-There's too many things to do.
407
00:14:19,884 --> 00:14:21,946
As a person. How does
anyone do anything?
408
00:14:21,971 --> 00:14:23,304
And-and bathe?
409
00:14:23,329 --> 00:14:25,567
Hey, you're bathing? I couldn't tell.
410
00:14:25,592 --> 00:14:27,393
Good for you, Bob.
411
00:14:27,469 --> 00:14:28,998
Someone else could've bought me.
412
00:14:29,023 --> 00:14:31,666
I could be in someone's
DeLorean right now.
413
00:14:31,691 --> 00:14:34,502
Okay. All right. Tina, take my
spot when you're ready, okay?
414
00:14:34,527 --> 00:14:36,286
- Just jump right in. Here we go.
- Okay.
415
00:14:38,324 --> 00:14:40,174
Uh...
416
00:14:42,293 --> 00:14:44,304
♪ Well, that's for the best. ♪
417
00:14:44,329 --> 00:14:45,972
Now switch up partners
418
00:14:45,997 --> 00:14:47,538
- and triple time.
- Aah!
419
00:14:48,040 --> 00:14:49,466
I hope we find the key soon.
420
00:14:49,491 --> 00:14:51,404
It feels like we've
walked a really long way,
421
00:14:51,429 --> 00:14:53,137
and my tiny feet really hurt.
422
00:14:53,162 --> 00:14:54,356
You know, physical health is a gift
423
00:14:54,380 --> 00:14:56,251
you give yourself every day.
424
00:14:56,276 --> 00:14:59,452
Or, in your case, maybe,
like, twice in your 20s?
425
00:14:59,477 --> 00:15:00,977
Uh, that's pretty generous, actually.
426
00:15:01,002 --> 00:15:03,419
I-I-I don't take care of myself.
427
00:15:03,481 --> 00:15:06,098
But I-I was thinking
about doing it sometime.
428
00:15:06,123 --> 00:15:07,627
Yeah, you're gonna be
really buff someday.
429
00:15:07,652 --> 00:15:09,309
I can't wait to see that.
430
00:15:09,320 --> 00:15:11,478
Anyone else notice the air
431
00:15:11,489 --> 00:15:13,647
getting a little electricity-y?
432
00:15:13,658 --> 00:15:14,931
Whoa.
433
00:15:18,687 --> 00:15:21,321
- Okay, that seems bad.
- What is it?
434
00:15:21,332 --> 00:15:23,102
It's like all the stuff
I should be better about,
435
00:15:23,127 --> 00:15:25,169
that I left on the floor of my car,
436
00:15:25,194 --> 00:15:26,493
formed a monster?
437
00:15:26,504 --> 00:15:28,537
And it seems to be very electrical.
438
00:15:28,562 --> 00:15:31,798
I guess that's how my brain
thinks car... power works?
439
00:15:31,947 --> 00:15:33,780
I-I really don't know
what I'm talking about.
440
00:15:33,805 --> 00:15:35,396
Maybe it's my shame?
441
00:15:35,421 --> 00:15:36,421
Shame-tricity.
442
00:15:36,497 --> 00:15:37,977
Your shame is so strong.
443
00:15:38,040 --> 00:15:39,631
Yeah. It's very strong right now.
444
00:15:39,708 --> 00:15:41,258
Wait. Look.
445
00:15:41,335 --> 00:15:42,968
It's the key to the safe!
446
00:15:42,993 --> 00:15:44,688
Oh, great! Not it to get it.
447
00:15:44,713 --> 00:15:47,316
So, um, Tape, can you do
some cool tape stuff to it?
448
00:15:47,341 --> 00:15:49,578
Snag the key? Then lift us out of here?
449
00:15:49,603 --> 00:15:53,155
Stand back, guys. This is where
preparation meets opportunity.
450
00:15:53,180 --> 00:15:55,531
And I am prepared to nail this.
451
00:15:55,594 --> 00:15:57,510
Here we go!
452
00:15:58,968 --> 00:16:00,759
Yeah, you're on your own, Bob.
453
00:16:05,359 --> 00:16:07,242
Tape, you can do it.
454
00:16:07,267 --> 00:16:08,712
We need you, man.
455
00:16:08,737 --> 00:16:10,379
I-I can't pump up a self-help tape.
456
00:16:10,456 --> 00:16:12,882
That's-that's your
job. Self-help yourself.
457
00:16:12,958 --> 00:16:14,867
Yeah, I'm just
gonna... I'm gonna take five.
458
00:16:14,892 --> 00:16:17,211
Bob, I feel like maybe
you're the only one
459
00:16:17,221 --> 00:16:19,000
that can defeat the
shame-tricity monster.
460
00:16:19,025 --> 00:16:19,963
Again, not it.
461
00:16:20,092 --> 00:16:21,776
I don't know how to do that.
462
00:16:21,801 --> 00:16:23,175
- Squeeze me.
- Not right now.
463
00:16:23,200 --> 00:16:24,186
Squeeze me.
464
00:16:24,211 --> 00:16:26,352
Ugh, fine.
465
00:16:26,377 --> 00:16:28,344
Oh, my God. That's it!
466
00:16:28,369 --> 00:16:31,126
The key is the key! The
key is the key to my shame!
467
00:16:31,151 --> 00:16:33,235
What if I could grab it? Maybe
it would kill the monster.
468
00:16:33,259 --> 00:16:35,393
I like it. I like it. You're welcome.
469
00:16:35,404 --> 00:16:38,062
And I could use rubber bands
to climb up, so I can reach it.
470
00:16:38,073 --> 00:16:39,689
Where are you gonna get rubber bands?
471
00:16:39,714 --> 00:16:40,714
Oh, boy.
472
00:16:40,817 --> 00:16:42,567
♪ Say hello to the, uh ♪
473
00:16:42,577 --> 00:16:45,361
♪ Fel-Fellow making yellow on a cello ♪
474
00:16:45,386 --> 00:16:48,583
♪ Cello's too wet
so we get a clar... ♪
475
00:16:48,608 --> 00:16:50,408
♪ Get a clarinet. ♪ I can't do it!
476
00:16:50,419 --> 00:16:52,415
- I give up!
- No, keep going!
477
00:16:52,440 --> 00:16:53,787
You got to not think about it.
478
00:16:53,830 --> 00:16:55,474
Free your mind, and
your hands will follow.
479
00:16:55,498 --> 00:16:56,925
Or your butt. I don't
know how that goes.
480
00:16:56,949 --> 00:16:58,528
But keep going.
481
00:16:58,553 --> 00:17:01,387
No, clear your head. ♪
Clarinet's too reedy... ♪
482
00:17:01,412 --> 00:17:04,218
♪ Clarinet's too reedy, so
we went to Ally Sheedy. ♪
483
00:17:04,243 --> 00:17:06,275
- Uh...
- Don't think about it. Keep going.
484
00:17:06,300 --> 00:17:07,458
♪ Ally Sheedy's too busy... ♪
485
00:17:07,482 --> 00:17:09,062
♪ Ally Sheedy's too busy,
so we got her sister Lizzie ♪
486
00:17:09,086 --> 00:17:11,323
♪ Lizzie Sheedy likes to cuss
when she's driving on the bus ♪
487
00:17:11,347 --> 00:17:13,400
- ♪ These are the words she likes to say ♪
- She's doing it.
488
00:17:13,424 --> 00:17:14,348
- Look at her go.
- ♪ Crotch, dingle ♪
489
00:17:14,373 --> 00:17:15,776
♪ Crap, boob, fart ♪
490
00:17:15,801 --> 00:17:17,518
♪ Nips, tips, double dips ♪
491
00:17:17,543 --> 00:17:19,405
♪ And that's why we
drove off the cliff! ♪
492
00:17:19,430 --> 00:17:21,355
Hell yeah! Hell yeah!
493
00:17:21,380 --> 00:17:23,075
That felt good! Can
I do that again, Mom?
494
00:17:23,100 --> 00:17:24,954
Uh, sure, sweetie! Go ahead!
495
00:17:24,979 --> 00:17:27,528
Hell yeah! Hell yeah!
496
00:17:27,656 --> 00:17:29,957
Okay, Squeezy Ball, we need to use you.
497
00:17:29,982 --> 00:17:31,251
What's left of you.
498
00:17:31,276 --> 00:17:33,075
But I still look the same, right?
499
00:17:33,100 --> 00:17:35,568
Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
yeah. Uh, even younger.
500
00:17:35,593 --> 00:17:37,760
Okay, I'm gonna throw you
up over the top of the seat.
501
00:17:37,785 --> 00:17:39,329
Okay, wait, what are you doing?
502
00:17:39,354 --> 00:17:41,655
Aah!
503
00:17:43,013 --> 00:17:44,655
Come on, dream strength!
504
00:17:44,881 --> 00:17:46,345
Oh, I'm so weak.
505
00:17:46,370 --> 00:17:47,807
I only weigh half a pound.
506
00:17:47,884 --> 00:17:49,467
This might be a bad idea.
507
00:17:49,492 --> 00:17:52,212
- There are no bad ideas!
- No, there are.
508
00:17:52,237 --> 00:17:55,056
Yeah, uh, getting a fire
safe and losing the key.
509
00:17:55,081 --> 00:17:56,833
Uh, not listening to a
really good book on tape.
510
00:17:56,857 --> 00:17:59,612
Yeah. Not cleaning a car ever
511
00:17:59,637 --> 00:18:01,939
now seems like a really bad idea!
512
00:18:01,964 --> 00:18:04,594
Your shame-tricity monster
is getting bigger, Bob!
513
00:18:04,619 --> 00:18:06,619
Are you making it mad or something?
514
00:18:06,644 --> 00:18:09,320
I don't know. I'm kinda giving myself
515
00:18:09,331 --> 00:18:10,497
the opposite of a pep talk.
516
00:18:10,522 --> 00:18:13,190
Well, it seems like
that's making it stronger.
517
00:18:13,215 --> 00:18:15,836
Right. It's like I'm, it's
like I'm giving it power.
518
00:18:15,861 --> 00:18:17,828
I wonder if I stop beating myself up...
519
00:18:18,165 --> 00:18:19,747
Ha! It got smaller!
520
00:18:19,772 --> 00:18:21,651
Okay. All right. Uh, um...
521
00:18:21,676 --> 00:18:23,584
I'm not beating myself up.
522
00:18:23,609 --> 00:18:26,627
I, uh... I'm good at some stuff.
523
00:18:26,652 --> 00:18:28,283
Um, Foosball, maybe?
524
00:18:28,308 --> 00:18:29,788
No, I'm not good at Foosball at all.
525
00:18:29,813 --> 00:18:31,304
Oh, no, it just got bigger.
526
00:18:31,329 --> 00:18:33,111
Restaurant stuff!
527
00:18:33,136 --> 00:18:35,395
You're really good at restaurant stuff!
528
00:18:35,420 --> 00:18:36,636
No, I'm not.
529
00:18:36,661 --> 00:18:39,243
You're a millionaire restauranteur.
530
00:18:39,268 --> 00:18:40,695
Uh, uh-huh. Yeah.
531
00:18:40,720 --> 00:18:42,362
Um, what else?
532
00:18:42,387 --> 00:18:45,142
Uh, you have so many ideas for burgers!
533
00:18:45,167 --> 00:18:46,816
Uh, I mean, I don't know.
534
00:18:46,841 --> 00:18:48,767
And I bet you're a great lover.
535
00:18:48,792 --> 00:18:50,342
Oh, no. No.
536
00:18:50,367 --> 00:18:51,625
You have soft hands?
537
00:18:51,650 --> 00:18:53,591
I do have soft hands.
538
00:18:53,616 --> 00:18:55,950
- Oh! I got bigger.
- You bought me!
539
00:18:55,975 --> 00:18:57,647
That shows some good judgment!
540
00:18:57,672 --> 00:18:59,764
Yes! I have some good judgment!
541
00:18:59,789 --> 00:19:01,250
But, seriously, back
to the burger thing.
542
00:19:01,274 --> 00:19:04,625
You really do have so
many ideas for burgers!
543
00:19:04,650 --> 00:19:06,363
Okay, you're right! It's true!
544
00:19:06,388 --> 00:19:07,898
I-I am pretty good at burgers!
545
00:19:07,923 --> 00:19:10,349
Yeah! Yeah, you are!
546
00:19:10,374 --> 00:19:12,173
Wow, it's really small now.
547
00:19:12,198 --> 00:19:14,333
It's almost cute. Hey, I bet
you could just grab the key.
548
00:19:14,396 --> 00:19:16,669
Couldn't have made it small
before it zapped me, huh?
549
00:19:16,694 --> 00:19:18,616
- Cool.
- All right, I'm going for the key!
550
00:19:18,641 --> 00:19:21,392
If I die, I want you guys
to know that I love you.
551
00:19:21,403 --> 00:19:23,030
- I love you, too.
- Feels a little soon.
552
00:19:37,954 --> 00:19:38,878
Oh, my God.
553
00:19:38,903 --> 00:19:40,420
It worked.
554
00:19:40,445 --> 00:19:41,922
The key is in my hand.
555
00:19:41,947 --> 00:19:43,546
The key is in my hand.
556
00:19:43,850 --> 00:19:45,528
There's no key there. Right.
557
00:19:45,553 --> 00:19:47,043
It didn't feel like it was in there.
558
00:19:47,068 --> 00:19:49,286
Also, that wouldn't make any sense.
559
00:19:49,465 --> 00:19:51,057
But that's... okay.
560
00:19:51,082 --> 00:19:53,549
I lost the key, and that's okay.
561
00:19:53,574 --> 00:19:54,647
Oh!
562
00:19:58,232 --> 00:19:59,657
Mwah.
563
00:20:02,686 --> 00:20:03,768
Mwah.
564
00:20:07,069 --> 00:20:08,606
I'm back. I'm okay.
565
00:20:08,617 --> 00:20:10,702
Were you guys worried?
Did you call the cops?
566
00:20:11,038 --> 00:20:13,444
Yeah... There you are.
567
00:20:13,469 --> 00:20:15,725
You didn't see all the
helicopters we sent for you?
568
00:20:15,750 --> 00:20:17,396
We had the best guys on the case.
569
00:20:17,421 --> 00:20:19,254
Everyone, I want you to meet,
570
00:20:19,279 --> 00:20:20,787
uh, two very good friends.
571
00:20:20,812 --> 00:20:23,053
This is Squeezy Ball and this is Tape.
572
00:20:23,078 --> 00:20:24,736
Gene, I also found your cough drop.
573
00:20:24,761 --> 00:20:26,217
My lucky cough drop!
574
00:20:26,242 --> 00:20:27,573
You didn't lick it, did you?
575
00:20:27,598 --> 00:20:28,972
Technically, no.
576
00:20:29,049 --> 00:20:30,682
- Well, did you find the key?
- No.
577
00:20:30,693 --> 00:20:31,808
But that's okay.
578
00:20:31,936 --> 00:20:33,745
I-I'm good at some things,
579
00:20:33,770 --> 00:20:35,270
and I'm not good at some things.
580
00:20:35,295 --> 00:20:37,053
And-and that's okay.
581
00:20:37,078 --> 00:20:38,222
Hang on. Let me get a pencil, Dad.
582
00:20:38,247 --> 00:20:39,751
- This is gold.
- Right.
583
00:20:39,776 --> 00:20:42,536
But the animal hospital
volunteer thing I want to do?
584
00:20:42,561 --> 00:20:44,936
We're-we're gonna go.
We're gonna go register you.
585
00:20:44,961 --> 00:20:46,374
We're gonna take the safe with us.
586
00:20:46,399 --> 00:20:47,432
I'm sure they've dealt
587
00:20:47,434 --> 00:20:48,631
with exactly this kind of thing before.
588
00:20:48,656 --> 00:20:50,763
You know what, though? I kinda
want to do marching band now
589
00:20:50,787 --> 00:20:53,038
because... ♪ Look what Tina
can do with her hands! ♪
590
00:20:53,048 --> 00:20:55,165
Do they do .that in marching band?
591
00:20:55,190 --> 00:20:57,510
- They will.
- Do you need a birth certificate?
592
00:20:57,535 --> 00:20:58,868
- Nope.
- I love it.
593
00:20:58,946 --> 00:21:00,278
♪ Look what Tina can
do with her hands ♪
594
00:21:00,280 --> 00:21:02,714
♪ Look what Tina can
do with her hands ♪
595
00:21:02,725 --> 00:21:04,507
♪ Look what Tina can
do with her hands ♪
596
00:21:04,584 --> 00:21:06,768
♪ Look what Tina can
do with her hands ♪
597
00:21:06,803 --> 00:21:10,063
♪ Look what Tina ♪
598
00:21:10,140 --> 00:21:11,681
- ♪ Can do with her hands ♪
- ♪ Boob ♪
599
00:21:11,706 --> 00:21:13,952
♪ Fart, nips, tips, double dips ♪
600
00:21:13,977 --> 00:21:15,852
♪ And that's why we
drove off the cliff ♪
601
00:21:15,877 --> 00:21:18,452
♪ Look what Tina ♪
602
00:21:18,477 --> 00:21:20,050
♪ Can do with her hands ♪
603
00:21:20,075 --> 00:21:23,485
Hell yeah! Hell yeah!
604
00:21:23,510 --> 00:21:25,580
♪ Look what Tina can
do with her hands ♪
605
00:21:25,605 --> 00:21:27,572
♪ Look what Tina can
do with her hands ♪
606
00:21:27,583 --> 00:21:29,249
♪ Look what Tina can
do with her hands ♪
607
00:21:29,274 --> 00:21:31,757
♪ Look what Tina can
do with her hands. ♪
608
00:21:31,781 --> 00:21:35,242
- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe -
-- for www.addic7ed.com --