1
00:00:01,001 --> 00:00:03,086
♪ dramatic music playing ♪

2
00:00:03,086 --> 00:00:06,006
♪

3
00:00:07,090 --> 00:00:09,301
[laser crackling]

4
00:00:09,301 --> 00:00:11,470
‐ Damn it.
Stupid thing, come on.

5
00:00:11,470 --> 00:00:15,807
‐ Ooh, build that Earth drill, Korvo.
Work those blue arms.

6
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‐ Stop undressing me
with your eyes, Debbie.

7
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I just want to work out here in peace.

8
00:00:19,061 --> 00:00:20,812
I'm not out here
for your sexual titillation.

9
00:00:20,812 --> 00:00:23,524
‐ Hey, the replicants missed the bus.
Can you take them to school?

10
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I got stuff to do.
‐ We didn't miss it.

11
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They purposely skipped our house.
‐ I'm sure it was an accident.

12
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‐ The bus driver hates us
because I tried to harvest

13
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one small tiny sample of her eye.

14
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‐ Can we please go?
Homeroom is where I decide

15
00:00:33,534 --> 00:00:35,369
who I'm going to crush on for the day.

16
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‐ No, I'm busy.
‐ Oh, come on, Korvo. Don't be like that.

17
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‐ You should be helping me
construct the Earth drill.

18
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‐ I have to take the Pupa to the dog park.
We don't wanna miss the labradoodles.

19
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‐ Oh, oh, is the dog park more important
than mining nickel alloys

20
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so we can repair our spaceship?

21
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‐ Uh, I don't know, Korvo.

22
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Can nickel alloy
catch a Frisbee in the air?

23
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‐ We won't know until we get some.

24
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You know, sometimes it feels like
I'm the only Shlorpion

25
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who wants to escape this garbage planet.

26
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‐ Hey, hey, you're the one
who chose to land here.

27
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‐ My scans didn't indicate it was
a human‐infested crap hole

28
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without a single redeeming value, Terry.

29
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We have been stranded here for a year.
How is that not a problem for you?

30
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[rumbling]

31
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[screaming]

32
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[people screaming]

33
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[alarm blaring]

34
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♪ ominous music playing ♪

35
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Come on, all right.
Come to papo.

36
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No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

37
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[yells]

38
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[yells]

39
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[barking]

40
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‐ Oh, you guys, there was a shooting
at the dog park,

41
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but you would never know 'cause
these dogs are just so happy, aren't they?

42
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Yeah, you like those little stumps?
You gonna lick 'em?

43
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KORVO:
Planet Shlorp was a perfect utopia.

44
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Until the asteroid hit.

45
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One hundred adults and their replicants
were issued a Pupa

46
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and escaped into, uh, the space,

47
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searching for new homes
on uninhabited worlds.

48
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We crashed on Earth, stranding us
on an already overpopulated planet.

49
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That's right,
I've been talking this whole time.

50
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I'm the one holding the Pupa.
My name's Korvo.

51
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This is‐‐ this is my show.
I just dropped the Pupa. Do you see me?

52
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[stammers]
This is ridiculous.

53
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I hate Earth.
It's a horrible home.

54
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And one of these days,
I'm gonna blow it up

55
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and just be done with the whole
stupid thing, I swear to God.

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♪ dramatic music playing ♪

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ReEncoded By Dr.XJ | PSA
www.PSArips.com

58
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[Pupa coos]
‐ Oh, look at those cute little feet.

59
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They're really growing in.
Look at 'em go!

60
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‐ Don't look at them.
‐ I have the whole day planned out.

61
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We're gonna go buy lottery tickets,
we're gonna win a million dollars,

62
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but then, we give it all
as a tip to a waitress

63
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and totally change her life.

64
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You go, girlfriend.
Buy yourself a new pair of shoes.

65
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‐ My plan is to sit in dim light,
spray nutrients on my stumps,

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so‐‐ until they grow out,
and I'll study repair manuals.

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‐ Korvotron, come on.
I know Earth is a little more

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inhabited with sentient life
than you expected,

69
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but it can still be fun.

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You just got to roll,
roll with the homies.

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‐ I'm not gonna ever like it here.
Stop trying to cheer me up.

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I just‐‐ let me grow my feet in peace.
‐ Whatever, Korvo.

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♪ upbeat music playing ♪

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♪

75
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[grunts]

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‐ Huh.

77
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[bell rings]

78
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‐ You ever get the feeling
people think we're weird?

79
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‐ No, and as
a scientist/bounty hunter,

80
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I am extremely perceptive.

81
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[groans]
‐ E. T. sucks.

82
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Go back to Uranus.

83
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‐ We're actually
not even from this quadrant.

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[grunts]

85
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‐ I don't think we should
have to go to school with aliens

86
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who are probably
gonna zap us with their ray guns.

87
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‐ Uh‐uh‐uh. Don't be racist.
We don't zap people.

88
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‐ Are you filthy fucking aliens
fighting in the hallway?

89
00:03:32,462 --> 00:03:34,173
Principal Cooke's office, now.

90
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‐ Who, who is this, uh,
Funbucket character?

91
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‐ Why do you care?
‐ I was unaware

92
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of a second
sentient species on this planet.

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‐ Bingo bango, I'm Funbucket.

94
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‐ Hm, I, I like that catchphrase.
[Pupa grunting]

95
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‐ Oh, yeah, he's got a bunch of 'em.
"Bingo bango"

96
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is the tip of the iceberg, my friend.
[Korvo laughs]

97
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KORVO: Oh, my. Funbucket appears to have
a healthy disdain for humans.

98
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‐ Oh, yeah.
One time he fed magic beans

99
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to Mr. Shromer
and it turned him into a bush.

100
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It turned him into a bush!
[Pupa exclaiming]

101
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‐ Oh, he must have hated that.

102
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Did he hate it?
‐ Oh, yeah, he was pissed.

103
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‐ Wow, Funbucket doesn't follow
any rules, does he?

104
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It appears that he has a secret lab
in a little boy's basement.

105
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‐ Yeah, they use it to solve
small mysteries.

106
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You know, simple math equations,
or who stole the principal's, uh, new pen.

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‐ This guy is fascinating.
I wish we lived near Funbucket.

108
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We could hang out and talk shit
about humans all day and night.

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Do science.
You know, Funbucket's kind of a Korvo.

110
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Don't you think, Terry?

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Bet he hates Earth and their stupid
monthly calendar as much as I do.

112
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ANNOUNCER [on TV]: Saturday, come on down
to the Gretchen‐Darth Mall

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for the annual mega sale.

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Deals in every store, and a chance to win
one of St. Peter's finger bones!

115
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With special appearances by Funbucket
and Rungo the Clown.

116
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‐ Oh, Rungo's legit. He has orange hair
and his house is a boot.

117
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I think he lives in Michigan.
‐ Wait.

118
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Funbucket is gonna be at our mall?
[Pupa exclaims, grunts]

119
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We could meet him.

120
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‐ Oh, dude,
you could compare notes with him.

121
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He could help us with the mission.
Huh?

122
00:04:42,658 --> 00:04:43,659
You like that M‐word, don't you?

123
00:04:43,659 --> 00:04:45,118
‐ We have to watch
all of these episodes, Terry.

124
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I need
to learn everything about Funbucket.

125
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Does he have a penis?
Does he reproduce?

126
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‐ I don't‐‐ I don't know, man.
I mean, it hasn't come up.

127
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Yeah, I mean, I think
he probably does have a penis.

128
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It's probably huge.
‐ That's good, that's good, Terry.

129
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We have to know all this stuff
before we meet him at the mall.

130
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‐ Well, what do you have
to say for yourselves?

131
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‐ About what?
‐ Someone broke into the computer lab

132
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and reprogrammed the iMacs
with artificial intelligence.

133
00:05:03,762 --> 00:05:06,306
iMAC: I used to be a cop.
My name is Richard Michaels.

134
00:05:06,306 --> 00:05:08,809
‐ This thing's been trying to arrest
everyone that uses it.

135
00:05:08,809 --> 00:05:11,019
‐ You're just blaming us
because we're aliens.

136
00:05:11,019 --> 00:05:13,647
Everyone has access to those computers.

137
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iMAC: Freeze, dirtbag.
‐ We found this stuck in the door.

138
00:05:16,859 --> 00:05:18,944
‐ Wha, uh, uh, I've got both of mine.

139
00:05:18,944 --> 00:05:20,696
‐ Why does that one look new?
‐ Uh...

140
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'cause I keep it in a glove.

141
00:05:22,614 --> 00:05:25,617
‐ From now on, I want nothing
but perfect behavior from you two.

142
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No terraforming the gym
or making pod people

143
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or any of that Outer Limits bullshit.

144
00:05:30,539 --> 00:05:33,542
You act like regular kids,
or you will be expelled.

145
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Now get the fuck outta here!

146
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[door closes]

147
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‐ Oh, you should have their asses
on the street already.

148
00:05:40,257 --> 00:05:42,050
You need to sack up, Cooke.

149
00:05:42,050 --> 00:05:44,553
‐ We'll get them soon enough,
Ms. Frankie.

150
00:05:44,553 --> 00:05:49,516
And then you'll see how powerful I am.

151
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‐ Come here.

152
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[grunting]

153
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‐ I wish they would just treat us
like regular kids.

154
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‐ [scoffs]
Yeah, regular kids with a shrink ray.

155
00:05:57,608 --> 00:06:01,570
‐ I'm gonna kick your ass.
Let me out of here!

156
00:06:02,279 --> 00:06:04,615
‐ I cannot believe we are actually
going to meet Funbucket.

157
00:06:04,615 --> 00:06:06,533
[stammers]
Do my robes look okay, Terry?

158
00:06:06,533 --> 00:06:08,744
‐ Oh, man, I'm gonna ask him
if he can breathe underwater.

159
00:06:08,744 --> 00:06:11,079
I‐I‐I bet he can.
Honestly, I just‐‐ maybe I shouldn't.

160
00:06:11,079 --> 00:06:12,497
No, I'm gonna ask him just to make sure.

161
00:06:12,497 --> 00:06:13,749
‐ Terry, I believe he's gonna be overjoyed

162
00:06:13,749 --> 00:06:15,626
to learn there are other
non‐humans on this planet.

163
00:06:15,626 --> 00:06:17,294
He will no longer
feel frustrated and alone.

164
00:06:17,294 --> 00:06:19,796
‐ I'm gonna invite him over for Nintendo.
You think he's a Nintendo guy?

165
00:06:19,796 --> 00:06:22,174
Oh, what if he's a Sega man?
‐ Do you think he has a mission, too?

166
00:06:22,174 --> 00:06:23,467
Oh, oh, I bet he does.

167
00:06:23,467 --> 00:06:26,136
Do you think his fur is coarse and hard
or soft and silky?

168
00:06:26,553 --> 00:06:28,138
Hm, odd.
‐ What, what?

169
00:06:28,138 --> 00:06:31,266
‐ Funbucket is larger
than he appears on TV.

170
00:06:31,266 --> 00:06:34,728
‐ Yeah, he is.
Hold on, is his skin made of cloth?

171
00:06:35,479 --> 00:06:37,147
Ew!
‐ What the fuck is going on?

172
00:06:37,147 --> 00:06:39,691
‐ There's a line.
You need to get back in line, sir‐‐ ah!

173
00:06:39,691 --> 00:06:41,610
‐ It's just some kid.
What did you do with Funbucket?

174
00:06:41,610 --> 00:06:45,405
‐ I demand to see Funbucket.
‐ Funbucket isn't real, you idiots.

175
00:06:45,405 --> 00:06:47,449
‐ Yes he is.
We watch him on TV.

176
00:06:47,449 --> 00:06:49,493
‐ It's a kids' show.
‐ A kids' show?

177
00:06:49,493 --> 00:06:51,578
♪ dramatic music playing ♪

178
00:06:51,578 --> 00:06:53,413
♪

179
00:06:53,413 --> 00:06:54,665
‐ Get out of here, go!

180
00:06:55,332 --> 00:06:57,417
‐ Funbucket isn't real?

181
00:06:57,417 --> 00:06:59,086
‐ Funbucket has to be real.
He has to be.

182
00:06:59,086 --> 00:07:01,088
‐ TV lied to us. It lied.
‐ That's impossible.

183
00:07:01,088 --> 00:07:03,340
All of human history
is recorded on the TV.

184
00:07:03,340 --> 00:07:05,968
I don't even know what's real anymore.
Are submarines real?

185
00:07:05,968 --> 00:07:08,971
Are penguins real?
‐ I don't know, probably not.

186
00:07:08,971 --> 00:07:11,557
Wait, the quantum injector.
‐ Is Friends real?

187
00:07:11,557 --> 00:07:13,058
Is Frasier real?

188
00:07:13,058 --> 00:07:16,144
If Frasier isn't real,
I'm going to kill myself!

189
00:07:16,144 --> 00:07:18,730
How can you even think of work right now?
‐ The quantum injector.

190
00:07:18,730 --> 00:07:20,816
Primarily used for
repairing organic emitters

191
00:07:20,816 --> 00:07:23,944
in the matter transfer array,
but with a few small adjustments‐‐

192
00:07:23,944 --> 00:07:27,364
‐ We can make Funbucket real.
‐ We need Funbucket.

193
00:07:27,364 --> 00:07:29,867
He could help us with the mission, Terry.
He's a man of science.

194
00:07:29,867 --> 00:07:32,619
You saw the lab he had with that child
in the kid's basement.

195
00:07:32,619 --> 00:07:34,663
You saw the shit he was doing
in that one episode.

196
00:07:34,663 --> 00:07:36,957
We need him to be as real as possible.

197
00:07:36,957 --> 00:07:41,879
Every single little tiny smidgen
of adjustments will matter.

198
00:07:41,879 --> 00:07:43,964
♪ dramatic music playing ♪

199
00:07:43,964 --> 00:07:45,841
[rumbling, hissing]

200
00:07:45,841 --> 00:07:46,884
[beeps]

201
00:07:46,884 --> 00:07:49,261
‐ Bingo bango, I'm Funbucket.

202
00:07:49,261 --> 00:07:51,638
‐ Funbucket, I'm Korvo
and this is Terry,

203
00:07:51,638 --> 00:07:53,390
and we are your new best friends.

204
00:07:54,516 --> 00:07:56,185
‐ You guys aren't gonna
try to fuck me, are you?

205
00:07:56,185 --> 00:07:58,145
BOTH:
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

206
00:07:59,813 --> 00:08:01,899
♪ smooth music playing ♪

207
00:08:01,899 --> 00:08:04,902
♪

208
00:08:05,194 --> 00:08:06,445
‐ Bingo bango!

209
00:08:06,445 --> 00:08:07,863
[screaming]

210
00:08:08,989 --> 00:08:09,865
[shutter snaps]

211
00:08:10,449 --> 00:08:11,783
[monstrous roaring]
[all scream]

212
00:08:11,783 --> 00:08:12,826
[Pupa giggles]

213
00:08:12,826 --> 00:08:15,412
♪

214
00:08:21,752 --> 00:08:24,296
‐ You are such a shopaholic, Funbucket.

215
00:08:24,296 --> 00:08:26,590
‐ Retail therapy, baby.

216
00:08:26,590 --> 00:08:29,551
‐ Hey, that's not your catchphrase.
Say bingo bango.

217
00:08:29,551 --> 00:08:33,055
‐ Uh, bingo bango.
‐ Oh, there it is.

218
00:08:33,055 --> 00:08:35,307
‐ Hey, hey, hey, hey.
Check out who's real.

219
00:08:35,307 --> 00:08:37,392
‐ Just let me past, will you?
Stop it.

220
00:08:37,392 --> 00:08:41,480
‐ I think you might maybe owe
our very real friend an apology.

221
00:08:41,939 --> 00:08:46,151
‐ I'm sorry I thought you weren't real.
‐ Yeah, it's... okay.

222
00:08:46,151 --> 00:08:47,694
[Terry grunts]
[laughter]

223
00:08:47,694 --> 00:08:49,780
‐ Ooh, let's go to the makeup counter
at Bloomie's.

224
00:08:49,780 --> 00:08:51,573
We can get you all done up
for the club tonight.

225
00:08:51,573 --> 00:08:53,242
‐ I like how I look.

226
00:08:53,242 --> 00:08:54,868
‐ Funbucket, this is not
gonna be a discussion.

227
00:08:54,868 --> 00:08:57,162
We want you to be dolled up
and spruced up

228
00:08:57,162 --> 00:08:59,248
so that the people are like,
oh, damn.

229
00:08:59,248 --> 00:09:01,375
Who are these cool guys
at the club with a Funbucket?

230
00:09:03,001 --> 00:09:04,920
‐ Look, make me big right now.

231
00:09:04,920 --> 00:09:07,506
I'm gonna beat you up really bad
but I promise I won't kill you.

232
00:09:07,506 --> 00:09:09,508
‐ Just do the maze.
You're screwing up my metrics.

233
00:09:09,508 --> 00:09:11,301
‐ This is stupid.
Are you sure we aren't gonna

234
00:09:11,301 --> 00:09:13,262
get like, super duper
crazy trouble for this?

235
00:09:13,262 --> 00:09:14,888
‐ Humans test lower species all the time.
[Lidia panting]

236
00:09:14,888 --> 00:09:17,933
‐ Let's just let her go in a field
so she can live with the animals.

237
00:09:17,933 --> 00:09:21,061
‐ And lose this data?
Do you even want to study humans?

238
00:09:21,061 --> 00:09:24,314
‐ No! I want to eat lunch
with friends and see movies with boys.

239
00:09:24,314 --> 00:09:25,941
‐ Done!
‐ I forgot to time you.

240
00:09:25,941 --> 00:09:28,485
Do it again.
‐ Man, this is fuckin' stupid.

241
00:09:28,485 --> 00:09:30,487
‐ I don't even know who you are anymore.

242
00:09:30,487 --> 00:09:32,948
You used to be so scientific.
Now you're just a jerk.

243
00:09:32,948 --> 00:09:35,701
‐ Continued experimentation could reveal
why everyone is mean to us.

244
00:09:35,701 --> 00:09:37,578
‐ I just want to chill at the mall.

245
00:09:37,578 --> 00:09:38,912
‐ Oh, shit, she's going to tattle.

246
00:09:38,912 --> 00:09:40,330
♪ dance music playing ♪

247
00:09:40,330 --> 00:09:43,250
‐ A‐ha, damn.
Look at this place.

248
00:09:43,250 --> 00:09:44,543
It's Trim City!

249
00:09:44,543 --> 00:09:46,795
TERRY: Ooh, they have
Channing Tatum's vodka.

250
00:09:48,755 --> 00:09:50,632
Oh, dude, dude, dude,
we should take Funbucket

251
00:09:50,632 --> 00:09:52,217
on a road trip and go to New York City

252
00:09:52,217 --> 00:09:54,469
and listen to podcasts
and Gaffigan albums the whole way.

253
00:09:54,469 --> 00:09:55,637
He's America's dad!

254
00:09:55,637 --> 00:09:58,015
‐ Oh, that would be quite
the enjoyable experience.

255
00:09:58,015 --> 00:10:00,934
Perhaps we could all stop at some
fun roadside attractions along the way.

256
00:10:00,934 --> 00:10:02,769
‐ Yes!
Hey, Korv.

257
00:10:02,769 --> 00:10:04,396
You think you're starting to
warm up to Earth a little?

258
00:10:04,396 --> 00:10:06,315
‐ I must admit, with Funbucket around,

259
00:10:06,315 --> 00:10:09,067
repairing the ship has lost
a little bit of urgency.

260
00:10:09,067 --> 00:10:10,360
‐ Oh, my God, you're gonna make me cry.

261
00:10:11,945 --> 00:10:14,072
Funbucket, we got your drink.

262
00:10:15,657 --> 00:10:17,451
‐ We should circumnavigate the crowd.

263
00:10:19,661 --> 00:10:22,831
‐ What up, my dudes?
Hey, I'm Terry, this is Korvo.

264
00:10:22,831 --> 00:10:24,541
We're aliens.
‐ Make room at the table

265
00:10:24,541 --> 00:10:27,169
so we may join you.
‐ You know these dipshits, fam?

266
00:10:27,169 --> 00:10:29,421
‐ No.
‐ Oh, he's just kidding around.

267
00:10:29,421 --> 00:10:31,507
Hey, we got you a drink, Funbucket.
‐ Take a hint, bro.

268
00:10:31,507 --> 00:10:34,301
Funbucket's with us now.
‐ I‐‐ wait, wait, I don't understand.

269
00:10:34,301 --> 00:10:35,219
With? What do you mean?

270
00:10:35,219 --> 00:10:37,387
‐ He means
go fuck yourself, bro.

271
00:10:37,387 --> 00:10:39,765
‐ I made Funbucket
with a quantum injector.

272
00:10:39,765 --> 00:10:41,016
Okay, he belongs to us.

273
00:10:41,016 --> 00:10:44,436
‐ Uh, I don't belong to anyone.
I'm real.

274
00:10:44,436 --> 00:10:46,480
‐ Oh, but‐but surfing, Thailand.

275
00:10:46,480 --> 00:10:48,774
‐ Travis and Avery are my friends now.

276
00:10:48,774 --> 00:10:51,193
They don't treat me
like some dumb TV sidekick.

277
00:10:51,193 --> 00:10:53,320
‐ Plus, we don't wear stupid wizard robes.

278
00:10:53,320 --> 00:10:54,780
‐ This is ceremonial garb.

279
00:10:54,780 --> 00:10:56,823
‐ That's it.
Get 'em the fuck out of here.

280
00:10:56,823 --> 00:10:57,783
[glass shatters]

281
00:10:57,783 --> 00:10:59,743
[laughter]

282
00:10:59,743 --> 00:11:00,994
‐ Later, dickholes.

283
00:11:02,412 --> 00:11:03,997
‐ What the hell, Korvo?
What the hell?

284
00:11:03,997 --> 00:11:05,541
‐ Who the hell were those guys?
‐ Look at me.

285
00:11:05,541 --> 00:11:07,292
I'm gooblering.
I'm making gooblers.

286
00:11:07,292 --> 00:11:09,586
KORVO: Our bodies only make gooblers
during extreme distress.

287
00:11:09,586 --> 00:11:11,004
‐ Oh, my God, I haven't goobled

288
00:11:11,004 --> 00:11:12,881
since they made us
shower together at the academy.

289
00:11:12,881 --> 00:11:16,009
‐ According to the Urban Dictionary,
we've been "squinched."

290
00:11:16,009 --> 00:11:17,845
It means we've been cut loose.
‐ Oh, man.

291
00:11:17,845 --> 00:11:19,263
Why do I feel like this?
It hurts.

292
00:11:19,263 --> 00:11:21,348
‐ Our bodies are not designed
for this emotional overload.

293
00:11:21,348 --> 00:11:23,308
There is a chance that
we will overheat and die.

294
00:11:23,308 --> 00:11:25,519
‐ No, I‐I can't die.
I've got a bucket list.

295
00:11:25,519 --> 00:11:27,980
I haven't touched a dolphin
or been on The Price Is Right.

296
00:11:27,980 --> 00:11:30,148
I'm supposed to fall in love
on a train in India

297
00:11:30,148 --> 00:11:31,733
and maybe the woman's
a little bit older than me.

298
00:11:31,733 --> 00:11:34,194
‐ We have to figure out
what those bros have that we don't.

299
00:11:34,194 --> 00:11:36,113
♪ dramatic music playing ♪

300
00:11:36,113 --> 00:11:38,198
They're just hanging out.
‐ That can't be right.

301
00:11:38,198 --> 00:11:39,283
I mean, we do that, too.

302
00:11:41,451 --> 00:11:42,452
‐ Oh, fuck!

303
00:11:43,871 --> 00:11:46,081
‐ What the hell?
Are you stalking me?

304
00:11:46,081 --> 00:11:48,292
‐ Oh, my God.
Look at what they're wearing.

305
00:11:48,292 --> 00:11:51,044
‐ Oh, shit, they tried
to copy our outfits.

306
00:11:51,044 --> 00:11:52,671
How pathetic is that?
[Avery laughs]

307
00:11:52,671 --> 00:11:55,048
‐ We wear things like this all the time.
‐ Bro, get a clue.

308
00:11:55,048 --> 00:11:58,093
Funbucket's done with you.
‐ Will you stop crying, you babies?

309
00:11:58,093 --> 00:11:59,553
‐ You're a baby, idiot!

310
00:12:01,221 --> 00:12:02,639
‐ Fuck you, Funbucket!

311
00:12:03,765 --> 00:12:04,933
[Lidia grunting]

312
00:12:04,933 --> 00:12:06,852
PUPA: Ooh!
[groaning]

313
00:12:07,269 --> 00:12:09,062
‐ Bad Pupa.
Drop it, drop it.

314
00:12:09,062 --> 00:12:11,356
‐ Seriously, it smells
really bad in there.

315
00:12:11,356 --> 00:12:14,276
I think it ate, like,
an old crabapple or something.

316
00:12:14,276 --> 00:12:17,154
‐ Why can't things just be the way
they used to be?

317
00:12:17,154 --> 00:12:20,866
TV was real and Funbucket
liked us and wasn't a dick.

318
00:12:20,866 --> 00:12:24,578
‐ Funbucket was too real.
Funbucket 2 is gonna be better.

319
00:12:24,578 --> 00:12:26,079
‐ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah.

320
00:12:26,079 --> 00:12:28,999
Make him love us, Korvo.
Give him all the bells and whistles.

321
00:12:28,999 --> 00:12:31,001
Make it so he never leaves us.
[beeping, whirring]

322
00:12:34,838 --> 00:12:37,299
‐ Who wants to go camping?!

323
00:12:37,925 --> 00:12:40,302
‐ No, we're going to the club.
‐ Put your sin in me.

324
00:12:40,302 --> 00:12:42,262
[retches]
‐ His catchphrases need work.

325
00:12:42,262 --> 00:12:43,222
‐ They're fine.

326
00:12:43,222 --> 00:12:45,974
‐ Y'all ready for bisque?
Good night, everybody.

327
00:12:47,684 --> 00:12:52,022
‐ Ha ha ha, oh, Funbucket 2,
you sure are an amazing dancer.

328
00:12:52,022 --> 00:12:54,274
‐ I've come here to do two things.

329
00:12:54,274 --> 00:12:55,943
[grunts]
Oh.

330
00:12:57,277 --> 00:12:58,904
Y'all ready for bisque?
‐ Hello.

331
00:12:58,904 --> 00:13:01,490
Nobody cares about your janky
knock‐off Funbucket.

332
00:13:01,490 --> 00:13:04,409
‐ You are just jealous.
Our revised Funbucket is vastly superior.

333
00:13:04,409 --> 00:13:07,871
‐ Uh, this thing is a freak.
You're seriously embarrassing yourselves.

334
00:13:08,664 --> 00:13:10,499
What's happening?
Oh, God.

335
00:13:11,208 --> 00:13:14,419
Unseen forces pulling us together.
‐ Whoa, whoa, hey, stop that.

336
00:13:14,419 --> 00:13:15,754
Get away from our Funbucket.

337
00:13:15,754 --> 00:13:17,673
‐ The quantum injector. Oh.
‐ Help! Help!

338
00:13:17,673 --> 00:13:21,093
KORVO: Maybe the‐‐ I think their flesh
matrixes are attempting to reconcile.

339
00:13:22,094 --> 00:13:23,595
‐ Y'all ready for bisque?

340
00:13:24,513 --> 00:13:26,056
[roars]

341
00:13:29,601 --> 00:13:30,811
‐ No, no, no!

342
00:13:32,312 --> 00:13:34,231
[screaming]

343
00:13:35,941 --> 00:13:37,442
[roars]

344
00:13:42,865 --> 00:13:45,242
‐ Hey, uh, you guys do to‐go cups?

345
00:13:45,242 --> 00:13:48,537
Great, could I get uh, just a couple
to‐go cups for the road? Thanks.

346
00:13:50,247 --> 00:13:51,582
[roars]

347
00:13:51,582 --> 00:13:53,667
♪ dramatic music playing ♪

348
00:13:53,667 --> 00:13:55,878
♪

349
00:13:55,878 --> 00:13:58,005
‐ You don't think people are gonna
get mad at us for this, right?

350
00:13:58,005 --> 00:14:00,465
‐ Terry, relax.
That could be anyone's mutant.

351
00:14:00,465 --> 00:14:04,887
‐ Terry!
[groans] Korvo!

352
00:14:05,304 --> 00:14:06,263
‐ We should do something.

353
00:14:06,263 --> 00:14:09,224
‐ Why do you need so many dolls?
‐ Why do you need so many ray guns?

354
00:14:09,224 --> 00:14:11,685
‐ Because we're aliens.
‐ It just seems excessive.

355
00:14:11,685 --> 00:14:13,770
‐ Lidia Johnson was last seen Monday.

356
00:14:13,770 --> 00:14:15,647
Her parents are pleading
for any information

357
00:14:15,647 --> 00:14:17,399
that leads to her safe return.

358
00:14:17,399 --> 00:14:19,401
[chuckles]
Good luck with that.

359
00:14:19,401 --> 00:14:22,196
‐ Lidia, it's Randy.
Stop fucking around and come home.

360
00:14:22,905 --> 00:14:26,533
God damn it, this is hard on me.
I didn't think I'd miss you this much.

361
00:14:26,533 --> 00:14:28,785
LIDIA:
Wow, my stepdad actually does care.

362
00:14:28,785 --> 00:14:30,787
‐ Do we get a reward too,
or how does that work?

363
00:14:30,787 --> 00:14:33,457
‐ Breaking news, I am being told
Funbucket is real‐‐

364
00:14:33,457 --> 00:14:35,501
‐ Dang, girl, you gooblering.
‐ Uh, oh, no.

365
00:14:35,501 --> 00:14:37,544
Yeah, 'cause the police are after us.

366
00:14:37,544 --> 00:14:39,254
‐ Yeah, well, what is it with humans
and their kids?

367
00:14:39,254 --> 00:14:41,423
I thought they liked making them.
‐ What are we gonna do?

368
00:14:41,423 --> 00:14:44,676
‐ This is a classic
"killed a hooker in Vegas" situation.

369
00:14:44,676 --> 00:14:46,762
Stalling is only gonna make it worse.

370
00:14:46,762 --> 00:14:49,640
Let me go and I'll tell them
to put you in a good prison.

371
00:14:50,307 --> 00:14:52,267
‐ We could dissolve her.
‐ I'll get the acid.

372
00:14:53,644 --> 00:14:55,646
‐ This is wrong.
‐ She's right.

373
00:14:55,646 --> 00:14:58,065
You should hit the side like ketchup.
‐ You can't just kill me.

374
00:14:58,065 --> 00:15:02,277
‐ Don't worry, we'll plant your pieces
and you'll grow into a beautiful new girl.

375
00:15:02,277 --> 00:15:05,155
‐ It doesn't work like that!
Can you just wipe my brain?

376
00:15:05,155 --> 00:15:06,698
‐ What's a brain?

377
00:15:06,698 --> 00:15:08,784
♪ dramatic music playing ♪

378
00:15:08,784 --> 00:15:11,912
♪

379
00:15:11,912 --> 00:15:15,082
‐ Wait, we can't park here.
There's street cleaning tomorrow.

380
00:15:20,170 --> 00:15:21,463
‐ Have you guys seen the shrink ray?

381
00:15:21,463 --> 00:15:23,549
It's usually in the cupboard
with the ice cream maker we never use.

382
00:15:23,549 --> 00:15:25,884
‐ Hey, I use it to freeze and eat yogurt.
[Korvo scoffs]

383
00:15:25,884 --> 00:15:29,513
‐ This is so embarrassing.
‐ Why are you dissecting your classmate?

384
00:15:29,513 --> 00:15:31,640
‐ Despite having been examined
by countless scientists

385
00:15:31,640 --> 00:15:34,142
over hundreds of years,
the human brain is still a mystery.

386
00:15:34,142 --> 00:15:36,019
‐ Plus, she was mean to us at school.

387
00:15:36,019 --> 00:15:38,564
‐ Everyone is mean to them.
I didn't invent it.

388
00:15:38,564 --> 00:15:40,816
‐ School sucks, okay?
We don't like it.

389
00:15:40,816 --> 00:15:42,901
‐ It doesn't matter if you like it.
We're on a mission.

390
00:15:42,901 --> 00:15:45,654
When things don't go your way,
you can't just give in to emotion

391
00:15:45,654 --> 00:15:49,324
and do whatever you want
like make a new Funbucket.

392
00:15:50,659 --> 00:15:52,911
‐ What?
‐ Uh, you can't shrink people.

393
00:15:52,911 --> 00:15:55,747
‐ We weren't gonna kill her.
We were just reprogramming her a little.

394
00:15:55,747 --> 00:15:57,040
‐ Are we in trouble?

395
00:15:57,040 --> 00:16:00,294
‐ We will discuss your grounding later.
Sew her up and let her go.

396
00:16:00,294 --> 00:16:05,132
‐ Your grounding is going to be prison
for the rest of your lives.

397
00:16:05,132 --> 00:16:08,177
And let me tell you,
being a weird alien in jail

398
00:16:08,177 --> 00:16:10,304
is not going to be pretty.

399
00:16:10,304 --> 00:16:11,638
[groans]

400
00:16:12,472 --> 00:16:14,641
Whose ass was I gonna kick again?

401
00:16:14,641 --> 00:16:17,477
‐ Just keep doing that until she's cool.
‐ Someone's going to prison.

402
00:16:17,477 --> 00:16:18,520
[groans]

403
00:16:18,520 --> 00:16:20,856
Someone's‐‐ I'm a sunflower.

404
00:16:20,856 --> 00:16:23,400
‐ Wow, it really is making her dumber.

405
00:16:23,400 --> 00:16:25,569
I can't believe humans drink this stuff.

406
00:16:25,569 --> 00:16:28,697
‐ This would be going a lot faster
if we had some Mountain Dew.

407
00:16:28,697 --> 00:16:30,782
♪ dramatic music playing ♪

408
00:16:30,782 --> 00:16:33,785
♪

409
00:16:35,495 --> 00:16:38,582
‐ Uh, will you drive straight?
‐ The effort is already being made, Terry.

410
00:16:48,300 --> 00:16:49,510
[tiny horn honks]

411
00:16:55,224 --> 00:16:56,808
[weak growling]

412
00:16:56,808 --> 00:16:59,144
‐ I guess we should, uh,
put it out of its misery.

413
00:16:59,144 --> 00:17:01,021
‐ [groans]
No, I should.

414
00:17:01,021 --> 00:17:03,357
You know, Terry, I've learned
an important lesson today.

415
00:17:03,690 --> 00:17:06,527
You can't project your own wants
and desires on other creatures‐‐

416
00:17:06,527 --> 00:17:08,278
Oh, crap, catch it, catch it, catch it.
‐ Oh, crap, oh, crap, oh crap.

417
00:17:09,655 --> 00:17:11,532
KORVO:
This isn't your fault, Combo Funbucket.

418
00:17:11,532 --> 00:17:13,242
We shouldn't have been guided by emotions.

419
00:17:13,534 --> 00:17:16,411
It's gonna be okay.
We're gonna have one last great adventure

420
00:17:16,411 --> 00:17:18,497
before you go live at the mall.
‐ The mall?

421
00:17:18,497 --> 00:17:19,540
What? I thought we were gonna kill him.

422
00:17:19,540 --> 00:17:20,874
I thought we were gonna
throw him off the edge.

423
00:17:20,874 --> 00:17:23,502
‐ God damn it, Terry.
See it, the mall?

424
00:17:23,502 --> 00:17:24,753
All the way down there?

425
00:17:24,753 --> 00:17:26,380
This was the most humane way
I could think of

426
00:17:26,380 --> 00:17:28,465
to end our time together, little friend.
[weak screech]

427
00:17:28,465 --> 00:17:29,466
It will all be over in...

428
00:17:30,175 --> 00:17:33,011
between 35 and 58 seconds,
depending on wind.

429
00:17:33,679 --> 00:17:36,390
TRAVIS: Stop.
‐ Leave us alone, Travis and Avery.

430
00:17:36,390 --> 00:17:38,016
You've done enough.
‐ Don't kill him.

431
00:17:38,016 --> 00:17:39,768
We love him.
‐ But he's a monster.

432
00:17:39,768 --> 00:17:43,021
‐ Bro, we don't care what he looks like
or if he's violent

433
00:17:43,021 --> 00:17:45,107
or if he's been combined
with another Funbucket

434
00:17:45,107 --> 00:17:46,692
on a molecular level, bro.

435
00:17:46,692 --> 00:17:48,610
TRAVIS:
He's still Funbucket.

436
00:17:48,610 --> 00:17:51,488
Just, just do it.
We'll catch you, broheim.

437
00:17:51,488 --> 00:17:52,906
[screeches]

438
00:17:52,906 --> 00:17:54,992
♪ swelling orchestral music plays ♪

439
00:17:54,992 --> 00:17:57,995
♪

440
00:17:59,538 --> 00:18:02,791
‐ Korvo.
[growls] Terry.

441
00:18:02,791 --> 00:18:05,127
‐ Shh, shh, shh.
It's okay, buddy. It's okay.

442
00:18:08,964 --> 00:18:11,258
‐ Do you feel like maybe
we're the bad people in all this?

443
00:18:11,258 --> 00:18:13,427
‐ We're aliens.
Our ways are mysterious.

444
00:18:13,427 --> 00:18:15,596
We can't be judged by human standards.

445
00:18:15,596 --> 00:18:18,056
Now let's get out of here before
we get arrested for all this shit.

446
00:18:18,056 --> 00:18:19,683
[explosions]
‐ Is that the children's hospital?

447
00:18:19,683 --> 00:18:21,351
Man, you don't really think of them
blowing up like that.

448
00:18:21,351 --> 00:18:23,604
I mean, what, are they storing
giant tanks of flammable liquid?

449
00:18:23,604 --> 00:18:26,481
In a children's hospital?
No wonder all these kids are getting sick.

450
00:18:26,481 --> 00:18:28,817
‐ By the way, when we get home,
you're throwing out that ice cream maker.

451
00:18:28,817 --> 00:18:30,527
You do not use it for yogurt.
‐ Oh, my God.

452
00:18:30,527 --> 00:18:32,654
Have you been sitting on that for an hour?
I do too use it.

453
00:18:32,654 --> 00:18:33,780
‐ That is the opposite of true.

454
00:18:34,615 --> 00:18:36,200
MS. FRANKIE: Hey.
‐ Oh, my God, what?

455
00:18:36,200 --> 00:18:37,868
I told you, I didn't touch the computers.

456
00:18:37,868 --> 00:18:40,579
‐ I'm watching you,
you creepy little fucking aliens.

457
00:18:40,579 --> 00:18:42,372
You think just because
you didn't do anything bad today

458
00:18:42,372 --> 00:18:45,125
you're gonna get away with it?
Oh, you are on fucking blast.

459
00:18:45,125 --> 00:18:47,127
I've got my eyes on you.

460
00:18:47,127 --> 00:18:49,505
‐ We didn't do anything.
Why are you always mad at us? I‐‐

461
00:18:49,505 --> 00:18:51,507
[Lidia vocalizes]

462
00:18:51,507 --> 00:18:54,843
‐ I used to be small,
but now, I am big.

463
00:18:54,843 --> 00:18:56,178
I'm peeing my pants.

464
00:18:56,178 --> 00:18:57,721
‐ [laughs]
So funny.

465
00:18:57,721 --> 00:18:59,932
You're the best, Lidia.
[Lidia laughs]

466
00:18:59,932 --> 00:19:03,560
‐ Every time I think I know the slang
you kids use, you switch it up.

467
00:19:03,560 --> 00:19:04,978
‐ Wow, humans are dumb.

468
00:19:04,978 --> 00:19:06,563
I guess we're never
gonna get busted on anything.

469
00:19:06,563 --> 00:19:08,690
‐ What does that mean?
Busted? Busted on what?

470
00:19:08,690 --> 00:19:09,900
‐ Uh, I‐I mean...

471
00:19:09,900 --> 00:19:12,653
‐ Did you guys shrink this girl down
and then lobotomize her

472
00:19:12,653 --> 00:19:13,946
to cover your tracks?

473
00:19:13,946 --> 00:19:15,030
‐ Uh...
‐ [sniffs]

474
00:19:15,030 --> 00:19:18,367
Did you dump Diet Coke
in her exposed brain?

475
00:19:18,367 --> 00:19:21,328
That's horrible.
Something has to be done about you two.

476
00:19:21,328 --> 00:19:23,121
You can't just go about
your regular lives

477
00:19:23,121 --> 00:19:24,623
without some sort of punishment.

478
00:19:24,623 --> 00:19:27,084
Things cannot go on
as if nothing happened.

479
00:19:28,627 --> 00:19:31,463
‐ You know what, Terry? I think
those bros really did love Funbucket

480
00:19:31,463 --> 00:19:34,216
in a much more deeper
and sensual way than we ever could.

481
00:19:34,216 --> 00:19:36,009
‐ You know, we should invite
them over for a game night.

482
00:19:36,009 --> 00:19:38,929
‐ Ooh, extra crispy, my favorite.
‐ Wait, KFC?

483
00:19:38,929 --> 00:19:41,849
Are we not in trouble?
‐ We may be trapped on this world

484
00:19:41,849 --> 00:19:44,977
that's on the brink of mass extinction
plagued by a species

485
00:19:44,977 --> 00:19:47,396
that destroys the environment,
but while we're here,

486
00:19:47,396 --> 00:19:51,775
breathing in the disgusting poison air,
at least we have each other.

487
00:19:51,775 --> 00:19:54,069
I could not replace you
with a million Funbuckets.

488
00:19:54,069 --> 00:19:56,321
‐ What's a Funbucket?
‐ From now on, we're gonna be best friends

489
00:19:56,321 --> 00:19:57,990
and we can watch
all the Harry Potter movies back to back.

490
00:19:57,990 --> 00:20:00,659
‐ That's not what I meant.
Look, from now on, we focus on the mission

491
00:20:00,659 --> 00:20:03,912
but we also be a family and all that
kind of shit and do that stuff.

492
00:20:03,912 --> 00:20:06,164
‐ And we can wear matching costumes
and compete in fashion shows‐‐

493
00:20:06,164 --> 00:20:08,250
‐ No, no, I'm covering my ears.
‐ Just two friends
holding hands down the street.

494
00:20:08,250 --> 00:20:10,210
Everyone's like, are, are they lovers?
No, we're friends.

495
00:20:10,210 --> 00:20:12,254
‐ What is the mission, anyway?

496
00:20:12,254 --> 00:20:14,965
It gets brought up all the time
and Korvo's always pissed,

497
00:20:14,965 --> 00:20:16,884
but nobody's real clear about it.

498
00:20:16,884 --> 00:20:19,803
‐ When the Pupa reaches maturity,
it'll evolve into its true form.

499
00:20:19,803 --> 00:20:22,639
One that'll destroy and rebuild the planet
in the image of the home world

500
00:20:22,639 --> 00:20:25,184
using data stored in its DNA.
That kind of stuff.

501
00:20:25,184 --> 00:20:27,853
‐ Wow, seems like a pretty important job
to put Pupa‐‐

502
00:20:27,853 --> 00:20:29,021
[both groan]

503
00:20:29,021 --> 00:20:30,898
‐ Gross.
‐ That's sick, Pupa.

504
00:20:30,898 --> 00:20:33,025
Don't eat the gooblers.
Bad Pupa.

505
00:20:33,025 --> 00:20:34,651
[crunching]

506
00:20:34,651 --> 00:20:37,112
Wow, I can't believe we didn't
get in trouble today.

507
00:20:37,112 --> 00:20:39,615
Korvo was pissed.
‐ We never should have kidnapped a kid.

508
00:20:39,615 --> 00:20:41,325
Honestly, I don't know
what I was thinking.

509
00:20:41,992 --> 00:20:46,371
From now on, we only shrink adults.
No one cares when some jerk goes missing.

510
00:20:46,371 --> 00:20:49,875
‐ Good night, Mr. Janitor.
I made you an outfit out of Kleenex.

511
00:20:49,875 --> 00:20:52,085
If it doesn't fit,
just rip it a little bit.

512
00:20:52,461 --> 00:20:54,546
♪ dramatic music playing ♪

513
00:20:54,546 --> 00:20:57,549
♪

514
00:21:39,466 --> 00:21:41,468
♪

515
00:21:44,137 --> 00:21:45,597
[imitating laser fire]